You can do it!

As stated in my last post, I had made the decision to "cut the (plantain) crack" cold turkey...and by golly, it worked!!  Sometimes the brain just takes you seriously when you tell it how it's going to be.  Amazing!

I haven't touched a single plantain chip since, and really haven't had the desire to.  I've even walked by them in the grocery store and kept going.  Determination is a wonderful thing. :)

That's IT. This addict is DONE!

If you are a returning reader you probably know about plantain crack.  That is, these little snack bags of spicy plantain chips under the brand name Fat Cats.  Well, for the past x number of months I've had a bag of these pretty much every day.  They're THAT good.  And addictive!

Occasionally, I'll be naughty and consume TWO bags in one day; it's happened maybe 2-3 times within the past month.  Now, while I could certainly be consuming something far worse, but I really feel a bit like a hopeless crack addict when this happens.  It happened again today, when I wasn't even hungry.  I was in the kitchen and the thought of these delicious chips popped into my head (I was standing near the shelf where I store the grocery bag of them in quantity).  Once that happens, there's no hope.  I'm eating those fuckers and enjoying every bit of it.

I hopelessly watched my hands grab the LAST BAG.  Then I felt myself walk over to the drawer to get the scissors and slice the top seam off.  I was on frigging auto-pilot, man.  It was at that moment that I decided that this was the last bag I'm going to eat and we're not going to buy any more, DAMMIT!!

This last bag was devoured hours ago and I feel afraid.  Afraid of what I'll eat for breakfast at work if I'm not devouring a bag of these chips like usual.  Wow.

Well I'll be damned...

I forgot to mention what ELSE I purchased yesterday!  I popped over to Medium Rare at lunchtime to see if I could snag some of their pork lard and yep, they had some.  I bought one container for now, but I later wondered "isn't this pretty much the same pork fat that I have in a mug in the fridge from cooking bacon??"

Anyway, it was $8 so I didn't mind trying it out.  I asked (again) if they had any beef fat available AND THEY DID!!  They had a few scraps to throw in a bag for me, NO CHARGE.  Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!  Happy me drove back to work and put the stuff in the fridge.

On another note, I've been somewhat upset lately that our grocery store had run out of my plantain chip-crack fix (spicy flavour) and SURPRISE, hunnybun sneakily grabbed three bags that he happened to notice while there yesterday.  The only three bags they had of the spicy.  One bag was already demolished this morning.  He's so sweet.  :)

That's alright...I'm okay...

I guess I'll be lost again for one more day...

Not really - it's just lyrics to a song that's in my head right now:

Love Big Wreck...anyhow, just thought I'd check in with a few random tidbits for those who want to know.

- My weight today is 145.2.  I'm happy about that, and a bit surprised since I have been inhaling a whole bag of these every day this week!  (Can you say WEAKNESSSSSSS?)

- Last night I cooked up a couple of strip loin steaks using the method that previously set off the smoke alarm and threw me into a migraine headache.  This time I was better prepared and also had the assistance of hubby.  The steaks were a little over-cooked but were still quite good.  I love how flavourful the fat turns out using this method.  Next time I'll just take them out of the oven sooner and we should be good.

- I'm finding that I really don't like the taste of coffee lately, especially with the chocolate-flavoured almond milk in it.  When I use cream (preferably 18%) it's at least a little bit more drinkable, but if it weren't a caffeine addiction I wouldn't bother with the stuff.  I do like having something warm to drink, though, which helps my stupid mouse voice become audible.

- My new desk at work is working out great - I love it to bits!  I found that I actually had it a bit too high when standing and it was causing some tingling/numbness/cold feeling in my right elbow.  Things are better now, but I really have to do something about my home computer desk, sooo...

- I ordered a GeekDesk electric height-adjustable desk base for home and it's on it's way!!  It should arrive this week (YAY!), so I really need to get my butt to Ikea to grab a table top to complete it.  My current computer chair creaks with almost every movement so that will likely be my next purchase.

- We've recently gotten into watching Sons of Anarchy (a friend gave it to us on DVD) and I can't believe how addicted I am to this show.  It's absolutely fantastic and the acting is top-notch.  We've come very close to tears on a couple of occasions already and last night I was caught off-guard with a stunner of an ending.  Christ, I hate it when major characters you like a lot are suddenly killed off.  I was traumatized!!  Ugh...  Anyway, this is just testament to how good the whole series is so far.  Next up is the second episode of the third season.  Thank GROK Monday is a holiday!!  :)

- My dad is recovering from a really bad cold and is still eating crap food.  Can't say anything about diet because my step-mom is a nutritionist.  *sigh*

Okay, enough already. Let's move on...

Every. Single. Day. For the past week I've had either a full-blown migraine or the feeling of one threatening to blossom.  I'd like to move on now, thank you.

Last Friday I at least had an excuse, what with the effing smoke alarm blaring in my ear (and btw, my ears rang for several days after that), but since then, there isn't an obvious trigger that I can think of.  Let's see...it could be the weather...it's February, I'm in Toronto, and there's NO SNOW on the ground.  Bizarro!

Otherwise, I thought maybe I'd upset some neck muscles while attempting my various bodyweight lifting exercises on the bar...or else it could be stress from my idiot clients...not sure.

This weekend we're taking my mom out to shop for a small kitchen table for two (for her new bachelor apartment) and we're also moving her into said apartment on Sunday.  Truck rental, the whole she-bang. Who's betting whether the headaches continue for those days?  Oi.

On to other news...this week I found myself at the Shoe Company shoe store (weakness! lol) and snagged myself a couple pairs of water shoes, which I am now using as slippers at home (blue pair) and at work (black pair):

They are incredibly comfy, light, and flexible, but I wish they came with steel toes built in!!  On both of my big toes my nails are slightly ingrown (ugh!) and today I managed to keep the toe-stubbing to one time only.  Is there a pain worse than this??!?  I'm sure there is, but man oh man, I could have screamed, it hurt so bad.

A couple days ago I stubbed my toe (and this means a gentle contact with a table leg, when you have an ingrown nail) TWICE.  Mama help me and my stupid feet.

I left a message with my doctor's office for a podiatrist referral but haven't heard back yet.  I also have a deep callus on the pad of my foot just south of my baby toe on the left side.  It's getting difficult to walk with all this going on.  :S

Where do we go from here?

My mom stopped by last evening for a visit, and of course the usual subject of how good I look in my jeans/top came up...she asked what my goal weight is.  I said 140 lbs.  She knows I'm currently in the 144 range, so she then asked me what my next goal will be once I reach 140.

I didn't know what to say, because I hadn't considered that, but after a moment I said that I guess I won't really need a new goal, because my body will continue to lose the fat until it's done.  It's not like I'm starving myself, so I won't whither away completely; my body will just become optimized, I suppose.

I like that idea.

This afternoon at work I was a bit peckish (my lunch was two sausages and the leftover veggies from dinner) so I went to see if there was anything decent enough to buy from the vending machine.  Silly tit!!  Of course there wasn't anything good in there...but my eyes locked on my old nemesis Coffee Crisp for a fleeting moment.  I thought for sure I'd give in (always did before) but I didn't.  And it didn't bother me one bit.

I went back to my desk and promptly forgot about eating until I got home.  Success!

Follow-up to the revelation post

In my last post I spoke about buying a treat as a bit of a test, and while I didn't gorge myself on the cake, it did taunt me every time I opened the fridge so I had to hide it behind another item.  That worked really well, actually, because I forgot about it so well that I was surprised when I saw it yesterday (I had to get a pork chop out of the container that was hiding the cake).  That's a point for me, in my books.

Yesterday we forgot to defrost the package of chicken thighs so we ordered in.  Swiss Chalet is our favourite chicken restaurant, which also offers a great-tasting fish dinner (with a side of veggies instead of chips/fries).  So we ordered one each, a ceasar salad each, and...a dessert each.  Crap.

Mine was their beyond-fucking-scrumptious coconut cream pie (weakness!!) and his was their carrot cake.  I didn't eat my pie until later at night because of being full from dinner, but as soon as I ate it I felt guilty for even ordering it in the first place.

No more.  I want to fit into my size 7 pants, DAMMIT!!

After Two Weeks on the YeastBusters Program...

I'm holding steady at 147.9 lbs and although there were a couple of days where I couldn't drink as much water as I should have, I'm still regular.

Last night I started taking Greens+; one spoonful mixed in a cup of water (today I used unsweetened apple juice instead). It tastes like oddly-fruity green hell if you keep it in your mouth too long. The juice helped but made it way too sweet overall, so tomorrow I'll try it with more water than juice.

Slept like a log last night and went for a walk with my mom today. I made a huge bowl of popcorn for my hunnybun with a generous amount of melted butter drizzled over it (OMFG) and I resisted having even one kernel. Wow. One of my (now, former?) weaknesses.

I tell you, once I am finished the 8-or so weeks of this program I will be treating myself with something decadent and sinfully chocolatey! (I just hope that by that time I will be able to eat one thing as a treat and not need to eat 8 of them or every day, etc.)

Update

Thought I'd post an update since I have now been on the YeastBuster program for a week.

Day one (Monday):
- Mixed the drink together using just water. OMFG - NARSTY!! Got a few gulps down before the taste hit me. Couldn't touch any more so the rest went down the drain.

- Went to grocery store to get some unsweetened fruit juice to mix into the next one.

- Forgot to take the DDS Acidophilus pills before bed. Oops.

Day two:
- Mixed half water and half unsweetened pineapple juice in the drink. MUCH better! Downed the whole cup and then realized I was only supposed to use 2oz of juice with the rest being water. Oops.

- Remembered the damn DDS Acidophilus pills at bedtime. Yay!

Day three:
- Drink tasted just fine with the 2oz of juice. Yay! Finally doing it right.

Day four:
- Had my drink in the morning. After work I met up with my BFF to see Breaking Dawn. Picked up some dinner from Loblaw's (grocery store); salmon and sweet potato fries (sweet potatoes are on the 'reduce' list during the YB program). Had no problem walking by all the junk food in the store. I was hoping to grab a bag of plantain chips to munch on during the movie but they didn't have any. At the theatre I had nachos and cheese (hey look, another weakness!). BFF bought the nacho combo for me, which came with a gargantuan pop (that I didn't drink...the sweetie was thoughtful enough to get me Coke Zero lol).

- Experienced strange tummy grumblings after eating, unrelated to what was going on in the movie (heh).

Day five:
- Drink in the morning. Today I noticed how perfect my poops are this week. Stealth! :)

- Forgot to take one of the two DDS Acidophilus pills at bedtime. Oops.

Day six:
- Drink in the morning. Ate pork roast leftovers for breakfast. Awesome bowel movement shortly thereafter. Got on the scale for the hell of it, expecting to see ~150 again. Nope!! 147.8!!! WOOHOOO!!!


Part of this daily drink is a spoonful of psyllium powder, so I have to drink lots and lots of water...which means constantly having to pee like a racehorse, but it's important so that I don't get stopped up.

I'll weigh myself again next Saturday to see how things are going, and then I'll also begin taking Greens+ as directed.

I'm also poo-free again, using only ACV as a rinse in every shower. While it's in my hair I use my scalp massager brush to loosen up any dandruff. Next week I finally have a hair appointment and am going back to short and flippy hair. Can't wait!!

Thennnnnnn, right after my haircut, we're off to see The Tea Party in Toronto!! I hope they play this song....it's my favourite:

My Weaknesses: After Eight Chocolates

Ohhh boy. *Someone* cute and fuzzy got me a box of these for xmas. Someone very naughty! Now I'm trying not to think about them and he now has to hide them on me. LOL

Evil temptation. EVIL!!

My Weaknesses: Tim Horton's English Toffee Cappuccino